John Ahern writes,
I’m trying my hand at haikus. Forgive me if the allusions are esoteric. Here are two. (The first is a combination of Eastern and Western poetry, i.e. the Odyssey.)
Mnesterophonia
Dedicated to Rachel Ahern
log piles getting low
random scar ekphrasis
opportune moment
Dedicated to Christopher Nicholas Evans Embrey.
“Well, to be honest, right now I’m not capable of understanding anything. It sounds like we have a poet who sleeps in too much, to me, though.”
beautiful sunrise
the poet doesn’t know though
a late last night.
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Posted at 8:37 pm EST on the 15th of October 2007 by John R. Ahern. Under Poetry as Haiku There are 5 replies. |
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I like them, you’ve got a lot of talent there. Keep up the good work! :-)
Very esoteric. Ecphrasis, hm? XD
What were you intending to convey in the first poem?
I am highly amused.
John– I am honored that you have dedicated such a beautiful poem to me. Both haikus are very clever and well-crafted. For the sake of precision (whence beauty, often)–for which I know that you are concerned, as a philologist and a philosopher–I must point out that there is a flaw in each poem, according to the rigid rules of haiku meter which state a 5-7-5 syllable pattern. In the first, there are only 6 syllables in the second line; in the second, there are only 4 in the third line. I hope that finding an additional syllable for each of these will not upset the delicate poetic balance that you have achieved. If it does, you could simply leave them as they are but without the haiku label…
John, you’re a blockhead.